Somewhere inside of you is a child who is feeling weak and afraid. To find out where this little version of yourself is hiding you will need to start looking in all the places that you would have felt inferior.
In order to overcome inferiority feelings to be worthy, this child really needs you to start being honest and open about any issues that you have buried deep.
While it’s not a bad thing usually, feelings of inferiority that go unchecked can become an underlying challenge for you when you ignore it. This happens because normally people will use the feeling to go in the opposite direction.
This isn’t the case when you have struggles, because you end up getting worse the longer you avoid the challenge. There are a lot of reasons that you can start to feel inferior, these things happen and start to work there way deeper into your subconscious.
It’s a feeling of being different or learning that you are inadequate compared to somebody else. You can be minding your own business and then somebody else decides to point out a flaw of your’s because they also feel that way about themselves.
Here are some of the reasons people feel inferior to others
- Height differences
- Color of skin
- Feeling stupid
- Feeling ugly
- Physically weaker
- Have a disability
- Needing glasses
- Lack of skill in sports
- Lack of skill in games
- Family is poor
- Your parents make fun of you for something.
As you can see these are things that go beyond anything you can control because they are not about the choices you have made. Often it’s because people who pick on you suffer from these same feelings of inferiority.
The best thing you can do is to stop yourself from believing that these are limitations for yourself. It’s mind over matter because you shouldn’t let people decide on what you are worth.
That must come from yourself and not from an outside source. When you don’t take the action to stop them from becoming beliefs that is when you develop an inferiority complex which becomes a bad thing.
Inferiority complex based on your limiting beliefs
Limiting beliefs are the ones that don’t help you in achieving any of the things you want or need. These will result because you have grown up with other people and have listened to what they have said about the world and yourself.
These will do more damage and cause you to suffer the longer you allow them to remain inside your belief system. As you can imagine it’s a major disadvantage to remain around the people who believe in the negative types of things.
This is why you hear the word toxic used when referring to people or relationships. It’s because the person hasn’t admitted their own flaws and is still in full denial about the fact that they even have those weaknesses.
Even when it’s somebody you love dearly this can only lead to a further decrease in quality of life for everyone that stays close to them. It’s in your best interest not only to identify the ones you have but also learn to remove the people in your life that are behind the causes of them.
Look at it this way, would you remain in the same place as a bully who constantly beats you up or steals your stuff? Then there is no good excuse why you allow for anyone to stay close to you that is harmful to your goal of self-improvement.
In order for you to start to remove these limiting beliefs not only do you need to change the people in your life but you will need to change the way that you think and talk about yourself.
I am currently learning what CBT is and it’s supposed to help with all the negative self-talk or negative thinking that reinforces these limiting beliefs.
That is just one method that will assist you but you still have to be willing to do the work that it takes to track and stop the thinking as it happens. This is known as being self-aware and is useful when you are using a journal that digs deeper into the feelings you have.
Another reason for inferiority complex is that you listen to people who are damaged themselves. This is different than the bully scenario because these people can be authority figures in your life as well.
What sense does it make to believe anything that comes outta the mind of a damaged individual who isn’t aware of their own flaws? Talk about the irony of them calling you something like stupid, when they aren’t even the sharpest knife in the drawer, to begin with.
There is no valid reason you should feel any obligation to listen to their opinions about what you need to do with yourself.
Fixing your self-image to change feeling inferior about your appearance
There is a lot more here than just telling yourself that you don’t believe you are ugly or that you aren’t weak because you don’t look like somebody else. This goes on to become your identity in a way that you overcome any of the doubts that come from other people’s opinions.
It’s one thing to convince yourself that you are in fact attractive because of the people who are judging your looks. They don’t know shit about beauty because they all simple allow a social norm to determine what they believe for themselves.
An example of this is to look at your front yard. Take the time to examine all the different blades of grass and what you find is that they all really look like blades of grass. Unless somebody else comes along and tells you to believe their opinion you don’t really care how spectacular or not a blade of grass even is right?
To get yourself over feeling inferior about the way you think you look compared to somebody else think about the blades of grass. Who is the one who decided what the rest of us believe and what makes them right?
When you understand that everything about your appearance is only valuable when you believe the person who makes that judgment you will be much better off. In fact, the only person whose opinion even matters is yours because everyone has a different perspective and belief about what is actually true.
Remove the labels you put on yourself right away
Only bad things happen when you place labels on yourself, and that nothing is good about it. Even when you label yourself as smart you will start to feel inferior when you are around somebody you know is smarter.
The simplest way to think about yourself is with the mentality of I am improving and not that you are one thing or another when it’s a judgment call anyway.
Many people use labels incorrectly and then all hell breaks loose within their belief system. Once you understand what is right and what is wrong, stop labeling everything else.
This will allow you to understand what types of guidelines you can form your beliefs around. This is also known as your core values and these will be based on what is morally right versus morally wrong.
Here are the two morals I love to live by:
1) Harming another person is wrong and there is no justification for ever doing it intentionally. This can be proven wrong in many ways because you will not want somebody else to interfere in what you believe.
This also means that you will want to treat other people the way that you treat yourself but with an exception. Which is where the second moral guideline comes in.
2) Love yourself no matter what the evidence suggests because if you don’t do this then nobody else will either. You can only cause yourself harm when you fail to recognize that your only job in life is to love yourself so that you can treat another person this same way.
Don’t fight yourself on this rule because it will just lead you to more suffering and more painful experiences than you deserve. That brings up another point about inferiority, that you deserve everything you desire and sometimes more then you realize.
Learn these two guidelines and then start to form your values and beliefs based on what you know to be true about life.
How to install your new belief system and do it right
Hypnosis is a powerful tool that everyone should be using to improve their lives for the better. It’s not like what you see in stage hypnosis shows or in the movies.
Nothing bad can happen when you learn to practice hypnosis. Because you will realize it’s your complete choice to listen to any suggestion that either you bring up or that somebody else does.
There is no way you can get stuck in a trance or do things you don’t want to do because you are in full control. The only way this can be misused is when you fail to practice it consistently.
It’s your challenge and you need to figure out the reasons that you are choosing to ignore doing something that can help you.
By establishing all the strong beliefs that will help to reshape your life and remove your inferiority complex, you will gain the motivation to continue making more changes.
Do you know what the opposite of suffering is?
That’s right its pleasure, but you will want to figure out the good kinds of pleasure and the bad kinds that only deceive you into thinking you’re making the best choices.
When you don’t listen to the values or the beliefs you have found to be in your best interest, this will result in an inner conflict that will break you into two pieces and be constantly fighting with each other.
Obviously, there is a lot that goes into an inner conflict because it’s got to do with the conscious vs the subconscious parts of your mind.
These two things should be working together to create one awesome individual, but it’s not often what really happens.
Feeling inferior matters here because even when you know better there is still going to be a part of you that isn’t convinced.
One reason that hypnosis works so well in getting your belief system to function well is that you will be able to eliminate these types of conflicts from happening.
Just remember that when you do one thing and believe in another it will result in a conflict every time.
In order to figure out where you are fighting yourself, you need to be aware of all your actions and understand why you do them.
Building your self-confidence is a life saver
Rather than going over everything that you can do to boost your self-esteem and your self-confidence just realize a couple of quick things.
Everything you develop an appreciation for being able to do is a plus one to your level of confidence. Everything you do that neglects that feeling will be a minus one to your level.
Sometimes things will cost you more minuses then positives so you need to be aware of what your priorities are at all times. Doing things that you know don’t have any value to you at all will not help you to become more confident.
To get the most out of your time spent on doing things, you will want to make a decision about where you want to go. This means you can take the right steps no matter how you’re feeling because you have a map that is your directions.
What does a map have to do with your confidence levels? By taking the time to plan ahead you will start to aim for smaller goals that can be easily achieved.
The reason is that you will be able to see results right away and gain the feeling of pride that comes with accomplishing those tasks. Over time each little victory you have in your bag becomes bigger based on the chain of achievements that you gain.
For example, setting a goal to journal about your daily activities is a great accomplishment to do for a week. But the bigger you make that chain the bigger the feeling you will get when you string an enormous amount of those journal entries.
Think about an alcoholic who struggles with sobriety during the first year. They will gain more confidence that they can stay sober for every year that the chain exists. Eventually, you will start to meet people who have twenty-five years or more and that proves that it’s possible to battle past your own demons.
How to become aware of inferiority in your life?
People who are battling with their own inferiority complex will often do things in the extreme. This is common when you start to look in the field of careers which focus on earning money.
There are billionaires who at one point in their lives didn’t like the fact that they didn’t have all the money to do the things that they wanted. So those feelings of inferiority took over and they went out to prove to themselves that they are not that poor child that used to get picked on and teased for wearing torn up clothes.
Now you may be wondering about whether that is good or bad? It’s really a judgment call because it’s likely they are overachieving in the area of making money. But what isn’t clear is what their inferiority is about beyond that.
Noticing that you are doing or thinking about doing things in the extreme is just one way to realize there is probably an underlying problem that will need to be addressed before the person can be truly happy and fulfilled.
You may not think it matters because they can buy everything they want, except that no amount of money is the same thing as not feeling the way that they did as a child and if they actually took the time to realize what that issue was they could instantly start to feel complete in their own life.
What is the difference between inadequacy and inferiority?
Honestly, they are two words that really mean the same things. You feel inadequate because you have something that is bugging you about yourself which probably stems from a limiting belief.
This means that it’s not possible to feel both inadequate or inferior without the other. You are really just trying to decide between a granny smith apple and any other variety of apple when you try to see the difference.
Don’t think that I am suggesting that you really go out and try to understand the exact difference. Unless you are planning to get a doctorate in psychology it’s not really anything you need to spend the time in trying to learn.
What you can do instead is work on all the issues that come up into your mind when you start to think about your childhood. This will give you a lot of different topics that you can dive in and explore so that you don’t miss out on what your root cause is.
I will let you know that when I first started to dig deep into my own issues that I started to think about one hundred or so different visuals that lead to a bit of confusion until I got into each one.
This does take a bit of time to eliminate the ones that aren’t a big deal from the ones where you feel truly hurt over. So plan on taking a few weeks to fully explore your past and it will be well worth it to remove a lot of the junk that’s there.
How to stop the feelings of inferiority from happening?
Like I mentioned before you don’t want to stop them from happening, they are actually good things that motivate you to become a better version of yourself.
The reason this is seen as a problem and not a great thing is because of the past and your childhood. Because there is going to be an impression left in your subconscious mind about people saying mean things.
Or that people didn’t accept you for who you thought you were. So any time you start to feel inferior in your life in the present is a chance for you to ask the question why?
When you discover that it’s an opportunity to learn things you don’t already know or to gain skills that you didn’t know you needed, it’s a wonderful part of being alive.
This does mean that you need to understand a few things
- Learn about your past and what things happened that made you feel inadequate. This is your chance to go back and to challenge the physical, mental and emotional abuse that is part of who you are now.
- Understand that you don’t have to keep the same beliefs you have held onto. Everything about you is designed to change and even what you believe can be upgraded to only allow the useful ones to remain.
- Realize that nobody alive is a perfect person and that nobody has everything together in their lives. The sooner you realize that every single person you interact with is feeling inferior because of somebody else including you the better you will start to feel about yourself. This will lead you to develop the confidence to do the things you are meant to do in your life and to become a wonderfully amazing version of yourself for the present and future.
How often do you find yourself asking questions about other people and what they appear to be feeling? This can tell you a lot about what you are doing to yourself inside.
When you try to put a guess into play about what another person is thinking about you, it’s actually something you are currently feeling inferior about and it’s your chance to understand right then and there.
What I hope you have taken away from this
I spent quite a bit of time trying to figure all of this stuff out about myself and to put it in a way that will make sense and be useful.
Please don’t hesitate to let me know if there is anything that is unclear or that you would like to learn more about. That is because when you understand why you feel inferior it will release so much of the pain in your life.
Nobody can be a perfect being, nobody will become a perfect being, and nobody needs to believe a single thing that is said about themselves because there is nobody who qualifies to be a judge of it.
Do not compare anything about yourself to another person, this is the reason that so many people stop trying to achieve the desires they have. When you stop taking actions you start to suffer more inside because you cannot avoid yourself.
One other point to make about comparisons is that when you stop trying to be somebody that you’re not, you can start to become everything and more than you are actually meant to become.
This will remove so much of the stress, anxiety, and depression that you have held onto for so long. And by the way, since there isn’t a person alive that is worthy of judging another.
You can easily overcome inferiority feelings to be worthy because you are in fact the only person that even gets to vote. Start to choose to be positive and coach yourself to stick with everything you want to become.