There are a variety of obstacles that you will need to overcome, this page is designed to give you information about each type. What that means is when you are struggling to get past any obstacle check this section to see if there is a post about it.
In case you are unable to find the solution to what you are looking for, leave a comment down below and I will create a post about it sometime in the future.
Also, feel free to ask any questions you want here since the only requirement will be that you are trying to overcome something and I can let you know the best way to do it.
Here are some examples and several links to get you started.
Do you suffer from a problem which you haven’t found a successful way to get past? The first thing you want to do is get as familiar with the topic as possible. This will increase the number of options that you become aware of and will teach you how to develop a plan of action to resolve it.
Once you can get the right mindset to confront your obstacle, it will then be possible to observe it from all the different angles which may be necessary. To do this you will want to understand all of the reasons behind its importance.
That means you want to clearly create a journal entry to explore why it’s in your way, how it’s blocking your progress, and when it was first encountered.
You can start out with the 5w’s and how but leave room for more exploration. Let’s imagine I am having trouble asking a girl out and it’s something I really want to do because I feel lonely.
Here is an example of the steps I would take to examine the obstacle:
What is my obstacle and how is it harming me? – I am afraid to ask this really cute girl out, what if she says no and makes fun of me because I am not her type? I have this scenario in my head about how it will go.
Who (who does this involve?) – Me, her name, her friends (possibly) and strangers who may learn of this from gossip.
What – An invitation for a date
Why – I think she is really cute and I have these thoughts about her all the time.
When – Often, sometimes I can’t sleep because I believe the two of us will have a lot of fun together, I am just so nervous about her not wanting anything to do with me because I am not that popular.
Where – It happens in many places, school when I see her, at work when she comes in to buy something, outside just talking to other people, social media ( I look to see if she is still single)
How – (How did this become an event to you?) Why is it an obstacle, she may say yes or no and that’s it. Realize that everything that happens before or after is irrelevant to this obstacle.
You see it’s not a big deal to ask a person out to do something, in fact, it’s the only way possible to accomplish any of the thoughts you have.
Thinking about all the different ways this girl will reject you is not going to help you get past it happening, it’s not going to be a good experience but it’s not going to actually harm you.
What is the truth about this scenario? – That you lack confidence in making your feelings for a girl known. That you clearly don’t think she has a good set of values because you are worried she will do something to hurt you.
You spend all your energy obsessing about her and how it’s going to be a life-destroying possibility when she says no thanks. You will end up looking awkward and making her uncomfortable to a point that she may lie to you and stand you up even if it’s a yes.
There are lot’s of possible outcomes to any “event” or any situation and it’s most likely going to happen exactly how you fret if you obsess about that one outcome.
Think about it from her viewpoint, you come up to her without any confidence ( this is telling her that you are unsure of what the two of you will even do together) it makes her start to feel uncomfortable ( you would as well if somebody was staring at you and not saying things in a clear and concise way) she starts to think about what is wrong with you and wondering if it’s her causing you to act so strange ( this likely triggers her to want to flee from being near you to go somewhere safe and comfortable that doesn’t make her doubt herself) and it’s probably going to be shared with her friends because you behaved so strange she asks them if there is something going on with you that she isn’t aware of.
Instead, you need to know the reasons you have for asking her out so that you can make those known to her as well. Most girls will not take kindly if you approach them and ask to go somewhere to have sex so that’s what you want to stay away from. What you want to do is show her a fun and loving guy who thinks she is beautiful, you want to get to know what she likes and cares about because it’s important in your life to include people like that.
When you can approach somebody without making them want to cover up, flee, or start to think of a better situation, you will make a much better impression in that quick few seconds it takes to be friendly.
There are a lot of different things to include in the approach, body language that shows confidence, putting on a smile, giving her breathing room and not being too close, you can even try to reassure her with a gentle touch on the shoulder or the arm to say I am not going to harm you.
Oops, I kinda got carried away with this event and was just trying to show you how to take a look at the obstacle. When it’s on your mind so much that it’s a real problem, realize it’s YOU who are creating it.
That means you will need to calm yourself down and look at the many steps that work to resolve the obstacle. A journal allows you to re-examine the different ways it can play out or to figure out the best way to work on it.
Here is the important tip with a journal – Imagine you have been living a life where you ignore 90 percent of your problems hoping that they just somehow go away and won’t come back up.
The damage that gets done by thinking that way is you become a willing victim stuck without a way to move about. The space in your mind gets cluttered with problems you can’t solve and they are temporarily buried.
Sometimes not even that deep because until you take the right action it will stay right there and not go away. Pretty soon you have a thousand things that get triggered in one hours time.
That means you spend your life trapped somewhere miserable and unsure what to do with yourself. You could’ve asked her out and found that she liked you already, or at the very least gotten on her radar now.
Because she knows you like her and you will remind her of that everytime you see her – good or bad btw. But at least you can learn how to keep putting more positive things in her mind and who knows maybe she will ask you out in the future.
You remove the uncertainty of the What If when you hear her response. That will allow things to happen and can improve the headaches you get by keeping a death grip on all the many problems which stack up.
Overcome – Means you take action and become willing to face the outcome regardless of whether it’s what you had wanted or not. That eventually when you gain enough courage you will get what you want because you don’t let one or two no’s deterring you from your goal.
Maybe you realize that she isn’t worth your time especially if she makes fun of you for asking her out. All of her friends learn that she is petty and maybe even one of them will think about you now that she knows you have guts.
That scenario was about rejection but it also looks at a fear of the unknown. That is what life consists of which you need to develop a full understanding about. You must not allow your fear of anything to make a choice for you.
To overcome something = Having the courage to face it head on
This becomes a possibility when you learn who you are and specifically what you want because now you can learn the reasons behind the want.
That also is the way you gain and find happiness because you build the courage to face things and know that it takes real desire to achieve them.
Happiness is knowing what you want and making a plan which convinces yourself it will happen. It’s only possible when you stop avoiding problems, solve them, and move in the correct direction so you can handle the next one.
This also means you will want to create a “toolbox” full of the skills which make those obstacles very easy to overcome. By doing things in the most intelligent way, you will become unstoppable and get everything you set your mind to.